Why community is still important to this introverted athlete

I want it out in the open.  It’s who I am and I’m not ashamed.

I am an introvert.

You might think that’s why I picked sports that involve a degree of solitude.  For most of my life I have been a runner.  All those hours of solitude – just me and my thoughts as I pound out the miles.

And to some extent it is true that spending time without having to work to interact with other people does match my personality.  But only because of what being an introvert really means.

In psychology, some models hypothesise that the observed behaviour of introverts or extraverts refers to the level of cortical arousal that individuals experience in the company of others.  Introverts experience a higher level, and therefore find social interaction more tiring/demanding and need to withdraw to recharge.  On the other hand extraverts experience lower levels and therefore seek out company and social engagement to be stimulated.

This makes a lot of sense to me.  I’m relatively comfortable and animated in a social setting, but I simply find it tiring to be with other people, even though I love their company, I’m quite happy to be alone, or to ‘simply be’ with my wife or very close family.  They don’t count as “other people”

For many years I trained and ran on my own, occasionally entering half marathon races but not really making any progress. So a few years back I decided that I would join a running club to see what I could learn.

For sure, I learned a lot about training methods. But I also met a whole group of people who I now call my friends.  I actually enjoy running with them much more than I enjoy running on my own – even though most of my running is still solo.

When I later took up Triathlon  I discovered a further group of friends, who supported my development as a multisport athlete but moreover were just nice people to be around. 

Subsequently, by qualifying for the GB age-group Duathlon team, I’ve travelled to multiple European and World Championships and competed in dozens of qualifying races in the UK.  And so I’ve bonded with another whole group of people, with whom I’ve shared coffee, beer, meals and occasionally the work on a bike in a draft-legal race.

We may be very different personalities, but what unites us is a love for our chosen sport. 

And in all the other areas of life where I’ve been alongside people with common interests. I have a much wider group of friends. Whether it is because I belong to a church, went to school/college with someone, or they are a current or former colleagues. 

We are united through common values or interests

I still value my time alone, but I’ve also valued these groups of friends who have become my ‘tribe’, my community, because of what we share together.  But maybe to some extent I’ve taken that for granted.

What my Halo has taught me about community

I realise I underestimated just how much my community of fellow human beings meant to me. In the past month:

• On the night of my accident, my Triathlon club companions were incredibly supportive.
• In the subsequent week my running buddies had a whip-round, bought me books to stop me getting bored and recorded a ‘get well soon’ video for Facebook.
• During my time in hospital, so many people came to see me while I was flat out with black eyes and in pain. More have visited since I got home. 
• I know many of my business contacts were similarly concerned about my injuries and wishing me a speedy recovery but just had to pass the message on via others.
• And being a Facebook user (*addict), it was fascinating and wonderful to see all the strands of my community weaving together in liking comments and offering literally hundreds of heartfelt thoughts and prayers.

In summary, knowing I was loved and supported and there were people rooting for my recovery helped me keep positive.  

If you’re one of those people, I’d just like you to know how epic you are!  Thanks for your prayers, love and support.  I know more than ever that I value the community of people in my life.

Moreover, I believe in a God who heals and in many ways my recovery has been miraculous.  It was a miracle that I was not more badly hurt in the accident.  It was a miracle that I managed to get out of the hospital within 8 days to be able to attend my Son’s wedding.  And my recovery since then has been miraculous in that whilst I still have this darned halo on, I’m mobile, back working and in very little discomfort.

I am incredibly grateful for the prayers of people of faith.

The Spiritual Parallel

Okay – so I normally tag the spiritual bit at the bottom of my blog, but today I’ve snuck some of it in above, just purely because my faith is so fundamentally bound up with the church community I’m part of, that I simply couldn’t leave that part out.

But there is still a bigger picture here.

I was made as a unique individual. Having introverted tendencies is fully part of how I was made, and that’s okay.  I’m okay with being alone – I don’t tend to get lonely.  But what’s not okay is for me to think that I can use that as an excuse to withdraw. 

If I choose to withdraw, not only will I miss out on the valuable input of others to my life, but others will miss out on what I am able to do to contribute positively to their lives.

God made people with all kinds of personalities.but he still made humans to live in relationship with others, in community.  Right from the outset of the Bible, He acknowledged that it was not good for Adam to be alone, so he instituted a relationship with his wife.  And throughout history, He guided mankind to cooperate, as he chose a people for himself. 

In the New Testament, following the death and resurrection of Jesus, we see that community principle working out through the existence of the Church, alongside the principle that God still wants the whole of mankind, including the historic nation of Israel, to come to faith and be part of His community.

That is why the church is described as the body of Christ – there are many different personalities, skills and preferences amongst people of faith, but by having a commonality of faith we are all part of the same community and only fulfil our true humanity when expressing ourselves as part of the whole.

²⁵ so that there should be no division in the body, but that its parts should have equal concern for each other. ²⁶ If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it. ²⁷ Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it.

1 Corinthians 12:25-27 New International Version (NIV)

There are people who claim to be Christians who are not part of any church, for any number of reasons, including past hurts because imperfect people in their community have let them down.  I can’t judge their motivation, but I can see that they must be missing out on blessings for themselves, and others will be missing out on what those individuals can contribute.

So I pray that it doesn’t take a major crisis like my accident, to make you truly appreciate that you are much better off being fully committed to Christ and integrated in his body, the Church.  If you are outside of Christ, on the fringe of things or even trying to walk a life of faith without believers around you, however imperfect, you are not living life to the full and others will be missing the best of you.

I have close church friends who I can pour my heart out to confidentially, I have a wider group of church friends who I have the privilege to be able to love and encourage on a one-to-one basis. I have a wider congregation who I can inspire to worship through using my musical gifts and who I can encourage to have faith by sharing my testimony. And beyond that, I’ve got a rich network of relationships with fantastic people who are not at this point Christians, but for whom I am profoundly grateful to God and who I want to be a blessing to.

What about you?  Do you fully appreciate the community around you?  Have you truly found fulfilment as part of community?

Header photo by Igor Kasalovic on Unsplash